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Open Letter to My Teen Self

“Oh I’m not teen anymore.”

Yesterday, I turned 20 year old. The first thing came to my mind as I woke up in the morning was “Oh I’m not teen anymore”. Then, I felt mixed emotions. That’s why I decided to write an open letter to my teen self to let all the feelings out and start the second decade of my life with fresh mind and soul.

I've gone through a lot in my teen years, life wasn't easy for me. There were many stages I had to face, the bad and the good. I know it'll get worse, but I'm grateful that my teen self somehow prepared me to take on the real world. And here's what I want to say to her.

Dearest Teen Fads,

July 14th of 2011, you turned teen. You were so happy back then because finally, you are an official teen. As a rookie teen, you went through the first stage of puberty and it was easy.. at the beginning. When certain situation was flashed unto your face, you definitely faced a big change in your life in 2012. This change was horrible, I know, I still can remember. Thanks to your friends, you went through that horrible time surrounded with supportive and positive people. You’re lucky because you got a lot of dependable circle of friends. Unlike today, I have to be picky and try not to trust a lot of people. I’m so glad though that you got to spend a lot of lovable times and made wonderful memories with them. Because ‘til now, they’re still in my heart and forever will be.

Facing depression wasn’t easy for you. 2012-2015 was the hardest journey you had to face. Adjustments from one place to another, family problems, friends problems, school problems, and self problems. It was like an ocean was thrown to you and you don’t even know how to swim. You almost died. But look at you now, you’re still alive. You survived and that’s because of you.
You’ve changed, Fads. You have. You’ve seen the reality of the world and you only had one goal and is still your goal ‘til now. Be a better person. You decided to do that in 2016 and change came. This time, it's a good change. You went to a battle with depression, and you won. You create good relationship with your family and friends. You studied hard, and earned recognition. You’ve improved your physical appearance, girl you even went to the gym. Haha! (Which I think you should do now and stop eating cheese. You’re not a rat, Fads!) You’ve improved your mental health and started meditating and developed good mindset. You’ve improved your spiritual being by taking your religion faithfully. You can even encourage yourself without any help from anyone. 

You can stand alone now. I, the 20 y/o Fads, is beyond thankful for the change you’ve made for the better. And I promise you, I won’t let you down. It’s going to be a roller coaster ride though, but I love roller coaster.

It’s honestly sad to think that you have to go away and I have to continue growing, however I also promise you that I will still be kiddie and won’t take life too seriously. I will have fun and I will be happy.

Thank you and good bye.

Present Fads 

What would you say to your teen self? 
Share them below. I'd love to hear from you.

The Astron


  1. First things first, happy belated birthday Fads! Hope you had a great birthday 😃 Your letter to your teen self is touching and yet so inspiring at the same time! I'm happy for you that you battled through your depression and eventually made it. The old sayings, "be a better person tomorrow than you are today", is powerful, I think! And it is good to reflect back on things and see how much we've accomplished, and seek opportunities to improve in the near future. Such a lovely post, thank you for sharing this! :)x

    Tyas | wepsgallery.wordpress.com

    1. Thank you so much, lovely. This means a lot to me.

  2. This is so beautifully written girl! Well done!

    x Lisa | lisaautumn.com

  3. Happy Birthday. The letter is very nice. I think my advice to you is taking from your past only the things that make you a better person and focus on the future. You have some great time ahead of you!

    1. Thank you so much for the advice, I really appreciate it.

  4. This has me weeping <3

    Also, happy belated birthday!


  5. Dear Fads, happy belated birthday! I'm so sorry you had to go through such a tough time in you teenage years - I faced depression too, terrible family problems, and to be honest, that makes me not miss that period of time. But on the other hand, those experiences made me grow and learn a lot of things I'm glad I know now. Please don't say your life will be harder from now on - I'm sure it will only get better!

    1. Awww, what's important now is we've dealt with depression like we're soldiers, and we won. I do understand that, I'm just preparing myself that it might get worse but I can handle it with all the strengths I have. Thanks so much for this!

  6. Happy belated birthday! I just turned 20 too, this day last week. It's definitely an interesting time because it feels so similar yet so different. I hope that this new decade treats you well and can help you view your teen years in a different way. I am glad to not be a teenager anymore myself, as I feel like it was a really tough time in some ways, and would just rather make a fresh start. Of course there is always a bit of sadness in ending a phase, but goodness comes in great waves too. x

    Anna // Zu Hause

    1. Awww thank you so much. Really? That's so exciting, I've seen so many bloggers having their birthdays this month. I totally agree with you, I hope you all the best as well. Let's create a fresh start, let's do that.

      Thanks so much for this, Anna!

  7. Aww lovely letter! Happy belated birthday, Fads! ❤

    New post: What To Style

  8. What a great idea! Unfortunately my teen years are way back in the past, but maybe I'll do this too :)

    Best, Gilda

  9. Beautifully written letter and I love how openly reflective you are here. Thanks for sharing such a personal post.

    Heather xoxo

  10. This is a nice write up

  11. Hope you had a lovely birthday! It sounds like you've changed, grown and have come out the other side stronger! Thank you for sharing your story~

    Vivian | LIVE IN LOVE
    IG | @viviyunn_


  12. Hi Fads!

    I'm only 19 but I can already feel like the adulthood vibe trying to creep on me. I'm turning 20 next year and I must say, you've put a lot of thought on your teenage years. Unlike me, I am not particularly sure what I have gone through my teenage years. So, hats off to you and I wish for your next chapter of your life of being an adult will be better and for more life lessons to come!

    Cheers! xx

    Just Naqibah | https://www.babblyandbubbly.blogspot.com

    1. Hello Naqibah. I felt this as well before I turned 20, and I can say that this was the reason of my growth. Idk but I felt so nostalgic and I have realized so much from my teen years- the change, the difference. Thank you so much!

  13. Happy belated birthday! It is always healthy to look back and reflect on life and your journey thus far.

  14. This is such a nice post! I also struggled with depression in my teens, but I managed to enter my 20s a lot happier. Glad it was the same for you. And also, happy belated birthday Xx

    Sharan Gill Blog // Instagram

    1. Thank you so much! I'm so glad to hear that, and I'm so happy for you.